Week 39: The End Is Nigh

Get ready to kiss the season goodbye

The title, it may not have been noticed, is actually being fought and won on the performances of just four premiership players. That is if we assume that the Malcademicals are a lost cause. Indeed, so similar are their teams that Pompey Puss and Woolyback Town AFC have transferred themselves into the following battle:

Leighton Baines EVE v Gareth Bale TOT
Dirk Kuyt LIV v Robin Van Der Vaart TOT

Managers of the Week are Nick Reed, Kate Wilson and Jonathan King. Their Stay Poyet Stay!, Menarepigs3 and Moobchester United respectively each scored a smaller than mammoth 8 points. Congratulations. The embers of the season may be fading out but your passion for the Manager of the Week Certificate burns brightly my friends.

I can tell.

All Hail The Chairman are highest climbers this week... the wonderfully monikered mob splutter up two places.

Ahem...

Try not to meet the eyes of either Neil Mcconaghy nor Steve Tierney this week. -3. Foof.


OFFL Cup Final
The OFFL Cup Final will be played in Week 41 between Real McDrid and Sheep City

Hart MC, Fabregas ARS and Drogba CHE are the only players shared by the finalists with transfers still left to play.  And that's why the cup still has its romance.


T h e   T a b l e
                                            Value Points
   Team                  Manager            (GBPm)Wk Tot
 --------------------------------------------------------
 1 Pompey Puss            Lionel Larking      55.0  4 412
 2 Woolyback Town AFC     Guy Harewood        54.4  5 408
 3 Fat Mal's MalcademicalsMalcolm Pratt       52.8  4 393
 4 Livercoolio            Russell Bielby      54.9  1 381
 5 BM Mingmongs           Neil McConaghy      52.4 -3 378
 6 Stay Poyet Stay!       Nick Reed           53.0  8 374
 7 Inter Milandrover      Smasher             53.7  0 362
 8 Shamone Muddy FunkstersDave Clayton        53.3 -2 361
 9 Budleigh Salterton FC  Ashley Keeler       54.6  7 354
10 RS T-Boy               Rick Beecroft       54.6  0 339
11 Marmaduke's Army       Edgar Rayner        54.9 -1 332
12 Salad Dodgers          Sarah Bingham       53.5 -2 330
13 Sheep City             Martyn Field        55.0  5 328
14 Freddie's Dreamers     Francis Fox         54.9  3 323
15 Wardy's Wanderers      Gavin Ward          54.9 -1 310
16 Real Mcdrid            Craig McHugh        53.1  3 307
16 Moanchester Utd        Alex Blundell       55.0  3 307
18 All Hail The Chairman  Rob Ivison          52.2  5 303
19 Wymondham Wanderers    Steve Tierney       52.7 -3 300
20 Irishpool              Mike Smears         52.3 -1 298
20 Dube Stars FC          Khumbula Dube       54.1  5 298
22 Lashings of Cheese     Chris Walsh         53.5  3 289
23 Nuttingham Florist     Andy Straw          52.2  1 277
24 Radnorshire Tigers     Alun Edwards        52.9  4 257
25 Menarepigs3            Kate Wilson         54.2  8 252
26 Just One Finger Albion Paddy Mirams        54.2  2 230
27 Double's Utd           Rachel Jones        54.4  2 216
28 Moobchester United     Jonathan King       54.9  8 214
29 Mintal Disorder        Minty Colquhoun     52.7  3 199
30 West Vam               Tom Vamos           54.8  1 182




                          Week's Average Points         2
                          Total Average Points        310
---

Week 36: OMG

T h e   T a b l e
                                            Value Points
   Team                  Manager            (GBPm)Wk Tot
 --------------------------------------------------------
 1 Fat Mal's MalcademicalsMalcolm Pratt       52.8 16 370
 2 Woolyback Town AFC     Guy Harewood        54.4  9 366
 3 Pompey Puss            Lionel Larking      53.2  5 364
 4 BM Mingmongs           Neil McConaghy      54.2  6 351
 5 Stay Poyet Stay!       Nick Reed           52.6 23 340
 6 Shamone Muddy FunkstersDave Clayton        53.3 11 334
 7 Livercoolio            Russell Bielby      54.9  1 333
 8 Inter Milandrover      Smasher             53.7 13 326
 9 Budleigh Salterton FC  Ashley Keeler       54.6 16 321
10 RS T-Boy               Rick Beecroft       54.6  6 318
11 Marmaduke's Army       Edgar Rayner        54.9  7 309
12 Sheep City             Martyn Field        55.0 13 299
13 Salad Dodgers          Sarah Bingham       53.5  8 297
13 Wardy's Wanderers      Gavin Ward          54.9  0 297
15 Irishpool              Mike Smears         55.0 10 288
16 Wymondham Wanderers    Steve Tierney       52.7 12 287
16 Moanchester Utd        Alex Blundell       55.0 12 287
18 Freddie's Dreamers     Francis Fox         54.9 13 279
19 All Hail The Chairman  Rob Ivison          52.2 15 277
20 Dube Stars FC          Khumbula Dube       54.1 10 274
21 Lashings of Cheese     Chris Walsh         53.5 11 270
22 Nuttingham Florist     Andy Straw          52.2  6 269
23 Real Mcdrid            Craig McHugh        54.5  7 264
24 Radnorshire Tigers     Alun Edwards        52.9  3 228
25 Menarepigs3            Kate Wilson         54.2  9 211
26 Just One Finger Albion Paddy Mirams        54.2  5 207
27 Double's Utd           Rachel Jones        54.4  3 199
28 Mintal Disorder        Minty Colquhoun     52.7  6 180
29 Moobchester United     Jonathan King       54.9 12 179
30 West Vam               Tom Vamos           54.8 13 158




                          Week's Average Points         9
                          Total Average Points        282
---

O. M. G. As they* say.

Like a boxer on acid rapidly slapping the maize ball training thingy, Fat Mal is fighting as hard as his lardy bingo wings will allow without causing him too much chaffing. His Malcademicals barge through to the front of this ever-changing race for the League title with a very healthy score of 16 points.

Only six points seperate the top three.

Pratt, Harewood & Larking: OFFL Law firm fighting for the top

Meanwhile, Stay Poyet Stay! - now rid of the bind that is 'watching Brighton get promoted to the Championship' - are putting in a late challenge for the Double. Surely not. They can't. Can they?

With only a few weeks to go Mr Reed'll need a few more Manager of the Week certificates to bridge that 30 point gap. Won't he? Yes, this week's certificate goes to Stay Poyet Stay! manager Nick Reed for the impressive 23 point week's haul.

In the background, the sound of a ukulele being tuned is pinging around the room.

---
* Awful, awful, awful people.


OFFL Cup Semi Finals
Will take place in Week 38 so the following teams need to get their transfers in NOW.

Sheep City, Salad Dodgers, Real Mcdrid, Stay Poyet Stay!

The draw will take place later on this week and will be announced on twitter.com/OFFL.