Week 22: Vamossian Exit

Tom Vamos waited till three weeks ago to enter his crack team of West Vammers. Why? Well, of course, it was the only way he knew he could be sure of poaching and pinching the peerless players in each position who've proven themselves to have popped in most points this season so far.... in time for the opening of the OFFL Cup.

Mr Vamos tried hiding

Such opportunistic behaviour is designed to snatch the coveted cup from under the bloodied noses of the regular week-in, week-out stay-hards.

In the words of Jar-Jar Binks... "How Wude".

Indeed, after the first week of the Qualifying Round, West Vam sat atop their Group with a smugly self-satisfied and sneeringly snobbish snigger - happily bathing in the assumption that the following two weeks would merely confirm qualification.

It will therefore be with much garrulous schadenfreude that the news of West Vam's failure to pull enough points to push through to the second round will be met by the rest of the league's managers

And while the bitter mob of early league entrants angrily gather round the cowering supine body of Mr Vamos, his eyes spinning, his nose bloodied, arms flailing, Moobchester United's Mr Jonathan King tip-toes out the back door with a mop of the brow and a clutch of the mooby chest.

Managers of the Week this week are Sarah Bingham and Chris Walsh, managers of Salad Dodgers [Qualified] and Lashings of Cheese [Failed to Qualify] respectively, by notching up an impressive 19 points apiece. A mere 20 points now separate the top seven places. It's, surely, the most open Championship in years.

Week 18: OFFL Cup First Round Group Stages Announced.

May the cupped bottom commence.  I mean Cup Battle.  Sorry.

Joint Managers of the Week are Chris Walsh and Rob Ivison who both steered their young charges, Lashings Of Cheese and All Hail The Chairman respectively, to a 17 point bounty for the week.

Meanwhile, the top of the table appears a little more compressed with only 17 points separating the top eight places. Fantasy and Reality reflecting each others' whims and wantsies.

Highest climbers are Livercoolio, up four. Lowest stoopers: Inter Milandrover, down four.

But, wait for it, more importantly...

The OFFL Cup
First Round, Weeks 20 to 22 incl.

There are four qualifying groups. The top four of each group qualifies for the second round - a straight knockout competition.

Teams have been put into groups according to this week's league table positioning, i.e. Group A consists of Fat Mal's Malcademicals [1st], Livercoolio [5th], Shamone Muddy Funksters [9th] etc etc while Group B consists of BM Mingmongs [2nd], Woolyback Town AFC [6th], etc etc.

You need to be in the top four. No more teams will be accepted after the forthcoming Monday 1730hrs deadline.

The results will be taken from the scores spanning weeks 20 to 22 inclusively.

So, you'd better get those transfers in if you want to make any sort of impact starting next week.

Good luck.

Group A
Fat Mal's Malcademicals
Livercoolio
Shamone Muddy Funksters
Marmaduke's Army
Lashings of Cheese
Just One Finger Albion
Real Mcdrid
West Vam

Group B
BM Mingmongs
Woolyback Town AFC
RS T-Boy
Moanchester Utd
Budleigh Salterton FC
Dube Stars FC
Menarepigs3

Group C
Pompey Puss
Irishpool
Stay Poyet Stay!
Nuttingham Florist
Salad Dodgers
Freddie's Dreamers
Mintal Disorder

Group D
Wymondham Wanderers
Inter Milandrover
Wardy's Wanderers
Sheep City
All Hail The Chairman
Radnorshire Tigers
Double's Utd